Whether you love it or hate it, it’s that time of year again: Le jour d’amour, Valentine’s Day. Are your V-Day plans still unclear? Here’s a list of things to do. (Don’t worry lonely people, there’s something in there for you too!)


I have a hot date:

The Romantic Candlelit dinner

Yes, it’s cliché. Yes, it screams Lady and the Tramp. But, it works. Take off that bro tank and those sweats, put on a nice dress. Put on a snazzy tie. Practice your etiquette with John Faranda before dinner. Order a nice bottle of bubbly. It’s the epitome of keeping it classy.

I recommend you stray away from the village though – you wouldn’t want to sit on the table next to your Gov professor or one of the deans (as much as we may love them). If you do choose to go to the village, my personal recommendations include La Picoletta, Viva Madrid, Aruffo’s, Tutti Di Mangia, Union on Yale, La Parolaccia, and the restaurant at the DoubleTree hotel.

“The Super Date”

If you’re an avid HIMYM fan, then you’re familiar with the super date. If you’re not an avid HIMYM fan, you probably don’t know what HIMYM stands for. Also, you’ve deprived yourself of nine great seasons of laughter. Anyways, to get back on topic, this Valentine ’s Day, you can design your own super date. If you can get a horse and carriage, then that’s great! Otherwise, try to find a few simpler things to do. Go see the light show at Pomona. Get two scooters and ride them around campus together. Better yet, get an adult sized scooter and ride together as if you were standing on the edge of The Titanic. Have a picnic on fourth floor Honnold. Get creative – the 5Cs are your oyster!

Use the “I can cook” card

If you live at the apartments or at College Park, cook your date something delicious (or buy it and plate it to look like you cooked it). Better yet, cook together! One moment you’re putting flour in the cupcake batter. Then, you flick some flour at your date.  Next thing you know, you’re both covered with flour, your clothes are drenched in water, and… well you know the rest of the scene from practically every rom-com/TV show to ever exist. Other permutations include feeding each other cake batter with your fingers and the less subtle spilling wine on each other’s clothes. But in all seriousness, preparing your own Valentine’s Day dinner can be both romantic and thoughtful. If you don’t live at an apartment, ask someone to use their kitchen, or book I-Place’s kitchen for the night.


I’m all alone:

Share the love, or lack thereof

Find a group of friends and go to dinner together. It’s much better to grieve as a group than to do it alone. Go watch a movie. Have your own galentine’s day – maybe even a bro-lentine’s day. Ignore the fact that you’re all alone on the most romantic day of the year. Your chances of finding a Valentine’s Day date next year will be much better if you share that tub of Ben & Jerry’s than if you eat it on your own.

House of Cards Season Premiere

Wine. Chocolate. Frank Underwood. Enough said.

All you need is you

And your laptop. And a box of tissues. Grab a Rom-Com DVD, a can of frosting, and a spoon. Finally, enjoy the show.


I need to take my future spouse out on the best, most romantic date of all time:

Collins Dining Hall

Whether you’re going out with the love of your life or a group of friends, the dinner at Collins seems to be the perfect place to go. Great looking menu. The likelihood of finding a reservation. Proximity to your dorm room. Also, we all know how chilly it can get in there – best way to get some cuddle action.


On a final note,

Roses are Red

Violets are Blue

Stags and Athenas

Get it on like Pepe le Pew!


Happy Valentine’s Day!



  1. I was surprised not to see my favorite little bistro on Amherst not in the Romantic Candlelit Dinner category. I mean, you can use your flex toward the meal………

  2. I thought the “All You Need” section was going in a TOTALLY different direction at first

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